One of these days you're going to figure yourself out.

I followed Peter out of the apartment and up the service stairs all the way to the top. He pushed the door open and guided me to the cold tarred rooftop. He took off one of his shoes and used it to prop the door open so we wouldn't be stranded outside in the cold. I walked to the ledge and saw the lights of the city as they spread in panorama that twinkled before us.

Building code in Washington had always prohibited anything in the city from being taller than the Capitol or the Washington Monument. The effect created a panorama of white marble and green parks when seen from above. The town houses of Georgetown that I'd grown up among were packed side by side and stood no taller than three stories, but the density of them blocks the view most of the city enjoys. Our sheltered and affluent village of shops and cafe's allowed me to ignore the Washington skyline while the rooftop of the Ontario gave me an expansive view.

Peter placed the boom box on the ledge and pressed play. "New Year's Day" by U2 blasted out of the speakers. It felt as though the song was carried by the lights of the DC night. Without a word Peter and I took it all in as I listened to the hard guitar work, steady drums, and strong rally call of Bono. My eyes watched headlights stream along the avenues alongside iconic buildings that were dramatically lit in a way that made them glow as if illuminated from within. The beauty was immense but the air was cold on the rooftop. I stuffed my hands into my pockets and shivered as I held my jaw tight and tried to keep my teeth from chattering.

Peter stepped closer to me from behind. He cupped the palms of his hands on my shoulder and rubbed up and down briskly, just as Aaron always did whenever I felt chilled around him The memory caused my eyes to water before Peter broke the memory with his words.

"You wouldn't really want to have missed all of this, would you? One of these days you're going to figure yourself out. You'll figure out who you are. You'll make someone else happy then. You'll make a great boyfriend, someday."

With the gentle pressure of his palms he turned me to face him, then he leaned forward and kissed me gently on the lips. For the second time that night, I didn't respond to a kiss. I stood and stared through it.

All is quiet on New Year's Day... I will begin again.

Nineteen eighty-seven started with a resolution in lyrics.

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